Depression is a common condition and can be described as a persistent feeling of sadness which affects the way we think, behave and live. While it is common for doctors to prescribe medication for depression, in this article I would like to discuss my perspectives and experience in dealing with depression.

Depression can occur from a variety of different provoking incidents such as a death, a financial loss or a failure in an examination ( Acute and chronic stressors). Whatever be the provoking cause, I look at depression as a situation where a person digs a hole in the ground jumps into it, cries for help and stays in the same hole as he refuses the help that is offered. I believe that there is a way to get out of depression without medication especially if one has the strong desire, mental strength and knowledge on how to do it. I love to quote the Eagles song “get over it” where Don Henley sings “ the big bad world doesn’t owe you a thing, get over it!” The realisation that it’s all up to you and that no one owes you anything and that it is up to you to stay happy, could be the start to your coming out of depression. So let’s look at what I think are important points to consider when you want to come out of depression.

1. Hope (work on your mind)– there is a popular saying that goes that you can live without food for up to a month, without water for up to a week, without air for a few minutes, but you won’t last even a few seconds without hope!

Your spiritual beliefs are extremely important for you to have hope in your life. Praying with the belief in God gives many people solace in times of difficulties. Belief that your prayers would be answered and that things would get better could help you overcome many challenges. Meditation could also help you focus your mind on being happy and on finding solutions to your problems.

2. Maintaining a positive mindset in the worst situations. It is very important to filter out negative thoughts, especially those that get you down and avoiding all sources of negative inputs such as television, radio, social media etc. To stay positive with a hope of finding the solution for your problems and not giving up, would keep you in the fight.

At all times, you must be able to look beyond the difficulties of the present and focus on a brighter happier future. This is crucial.

3. Change your thinking. Thinking is a mental exercise that doesn’t come naturally to most of us. If there is a problem, it’s important that we sit down in a quiet place and introspect, and think the thought right through to its best solution/conclusion. Most often, we get distracted and lose our way. It would be helpful to use pen and paper and devise an algorithmic approach to all our problems and with adequate practice this can be done entirely in the mind. Meditating regularly can help the mind focus and think better.

4. Change your situation/environment. Very often we find ourselves stuck in an environment that causes depression. We may be living with people who get us down or working in a very negative or stressful environment. If you can change this environment, you may be able to live happily again. Get out of your comfort zone, meet new people and make new friends.

5. Action steps to cure depression. Always focus on the A U C – area under control i.e., the only person you can control is yourself as opposed to A B C – area beyond control i.e. everyone and every thing that’s outside your physical body. There is a story told about a man who wanted to change the world when he was young. As he reached his middle age he realised that changing the world was going to be difficult and so tried to change his children. When he was much older, he realised that he had failed to change his children and tried hard to change his wife. On his death bed, he realised that the only person he could have changed was himself and that he could have saved himself a lot of mental turmoil and stress if only he had focused on himself instead of trying to change others.

Worrying about the future is such a waste of time, worrying about the past is also wasted time. Don’t look for problems that don’t exist. So focus on the present and spend your time in trying to find solutions for your problems. What can’t be cured must be endured. So it would give you a lot of peace to accept your situation especially if you can’t change it.

Many people find or feel that they are trapped by circumstances that are unique to them. Many people love to live in the past. They love to talk and think about how nice the past was and how terrible the present is. This kind of escapism doesn’t help them at all. Some people actually seem to get a lot of enjoyment from their suffering, and are very reluctant to change the way they look at things, many people can find happiness by chasing a worthwhile dream. Looking forward into the future i.e., chasing dreams will help them escape from the difficulties of their present circumstances.

Form new habits to change the course of your life. Each habit has a cycle where you have a stimulus, a response, a consequence and the repetition of the cycle which establishes the habit. To make new and good habits one needs to change the response to a particular stimulus and break the old habit cycle.

Exercise your body. Improving your physical fitness definitely helps your mind stay happy. Exercise releases certain happy hormones in the brain that can help you cope with stress.

6. Count your blessing and be grateful for what you have got. Being grateful immediately brings to focus all the good things in your life. Even in the worst of times, you will realize that your life hasn’t been all bad and that should give you the strength to recover.

7. A few more suggestions.

Reduce your screen time. There have been many studies that have shown that the more time that someone spends in front of the screen of an electronic device, the greater the chances of feeling low.

Get out of your homes, get some fresh air and start a new exercise program.

Ask for help as the biblical saying goes “ask and you shall receive”.

Find the people who can help you and support you in difficult times.

Be flexible, negotiate with others and don’t be stubborn in holding onto your ideas and views.

While all of this is easy to write or read this in a blog, you need to be really strong to will your way out of depression. You may need to find an experienced counsellor who can guide you through your difficult times. Best wishes!